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A Look Inside Waterkid100’s Diary

After many nights of the constant banging of the obese child’s mother, or Waterkid as we’ve come to know him (the obese child) and the many cum-filled good night kisses he has received from his ‘mum’ (cum filled from a long day of sucking my dick, of course.) I decided to step inside his room, which smelt like many of the Hostess Company snacks, ding dongs, snowballs, god I fucking hate snowballs, and twinkies, holy shit you have no idea the tremendous amounts of empty Twinkie boxes I had seen. Anyways, back on topic. I stepped in only to find his diary under his Barbie pillow, and I said, “What the hell, lemme read it.” He had one of those password protected diaries you find in Toys ‘R’ Us or some shit, anyways, his password of course, was ‘I ❤ Ioioluk". You have no idea the many secrets I found:

December 25th, 2013
After insulting my fellow homosexuals I ran (just kidding, I can’t run) to Ioioluk’s house after the outrage of not getting a Hostess factory from Santa Claus, I cried, like a little bitch. Ioioluk and I decided to do the deed. I rode on his bright yellow cock like a goddamn horse screamin’ ‘Giddyup!’ Too bad Roberto came back to get his bag of weed and caught us.

After reading this article, I honestly laughed like an insane little shit, but I realized this: WATERKID IS A HOMOSEXUAL?! After coming to this realization I read further in this diary of his, only to find this.

December 29th, 2013
After crying for four hours because Roberto was being a fucking cock blocker (Niggers, amirite?) I decided to go insult my secret crush, WGFV. After he didn’t play along I cried more! Doesn’t he realize I just want to get in his moose pants? Fucking stupid moose. After that I returned to give death threats to WG. I told him to give me his address so I can ‘kill him’, but I only meant I’d destroy his cock if it continues to reject me and my cock. If I can’t ride it, NO ONE CAN!

My analysis? This kid is gayer than all the pride parades in March across the world put together (sorry WG). This son of a bitch hides his homosexuality by insulting them, huh. So all you gay haters out there (Spi, Andrew) better come out now before I exploit your homosexuality like I did to Wankerskid, oh shit sorry, Waterkid. Thank youRoberto who informed me of Water’s gayness so I told CPAC themselves.

Lild’s day o’ news, over. Remember:
Stay classy Oohma.


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