• The Underground Mafias Army of Club Penguin better known as the “UMA” is one of the first club penguin armies it was created in 2006 by a famous club penguin blogger named Pink Mafias, we are one of the largest club penguin armies and we give away mascot meetup times and CPPS cheats click the join button and be a part of us!

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Closure Of The UMA

Before I begin, I must confess that this is the culmination of my knowledge of the state of UMA thus far; therefore, my ideas, philosophies and opinions may be flawed. I do hold my claims with much pride, for I have taken a great deal of thought into these ideas. I do not protest to the fact that I am naive, ignorant, flawed, wrong or young. However, I do believe everyone is a little of all those mentioned when concerned with the state of the UMA. I do my best to not be supercilious, though when writing to oneself; it can tend to slip by. With all this said, may I now embark on my first and final post on the Underground Mafias Army, our home, our sanction – and most of all – one of the oldest and sacred armies left in this community.

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Hall of Fame Announcements & Updates

As per many votes and discussions in the recent weeks UMA will be updating its current HOF and other awards page to include and update candidates that would otherwise not be recognized or seen after. Due to the circumstance some UMA Legends will not be named and others were not asked out of personal reasons.

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LOL HOW MANY TIMES DO WE GOTTA SAY THIS

HEY GUYS WHATS GOING ON, IM WRITING TO YOU LIVE FROM THE STREETS OF KABUL, SORRY FOR THE DELAY I WAS TOO BUSY HANGING OUT WITH THE BOYS IN AFGHANISTAN SHITS BEEN WILD OUT HERE.

(ME AND THE BOYS STEALING SOME OF JOE BIDENS HELICOPTERS LOL)

IN MY ADVENTURES I WAS REACHED OUT TO FROM MY NOKIA CELL PHONE BY UMA SPIES INFORMING ME THAT MORE ARMIES ARE USING THE UMA NAME. THE ARMY USING IT THIS TIME IS THE PEOPLES IMPERIAL CONFEDERATION (WALMART UMA). NOW THIS IS NOT A SLAM POST ON PIC, HOWEVER IT MORE DIRECTED TOWARDS A SOLE MAN. LEGOMAN. WHILE IT WAS A GREAT ATTEMPT TO FREE MITTENS FROM A STUPID ARMY NAMED POST MALONE ARMY (WHO COMES UP WITH THIS SHIT NOWADAYS MAN), I DO RESPECT IT. HOWEVER PLEASE REFER FROM USING UMAS NAME IN GAY TACTICS LIKE THIS

&

WHAT IS THAT LAST ONE MAN LOL. WHAT HAVE ARMIES COME TO NOWADAYS. BEATS THE FUCK OUT OF ME MAN. ANYWAY, IN HINDSIGHT, PLEASE FUCKING STOP USING UMAS NAME FOR YOUR SHITTY ARMIES TACTICS, ONLY A FEW PEOPLE WHO WERENT IN UMA HAVE THAT PRIVILEDGE. UMA IS NOT A TREND, ITS NOT A FUCKING CRINGE PICK ME GIRL FRIEND CIRCLE, SO PLEASE STOP TREATING IT LIKE SO. PLEASE ALSO STOP SEEKING ATTENTION FROM THE UMA LEGENDS TO STROKE YOUR OWN EGO, ITS REALLY FUCKING RETARDED.

NOW MY FRIENDS I MUST RETURN TO MY POST, WE HAVE A WAR TO WIN! INSHALLAH UMA.

My Last Take

Good morning Underground Mafias and outsiders alike, I apologize for not being able to attend the final battle, as I was attending to more personal matters. I’d like to congratulate the Help Force for claiming victory, but if you haven’t read the last post, we would rather not partake in a matter involving the STAGNANT FOUR. I still fucking hate Ayan but hopefully, the tournament goes well for our opponents.

I’ve lost count of how many times I’ve come to this conclusion that I’m done with the community, but fortunately I was able to leave with no regrets (both this time and the previous time). Still, as I kept contact with select members and aim to leave Discord entirely in the upcoming future, I thought of sharing my two cents on the matters here. Why? If I don’t put out all my opinions, a pent-up obsession would be no good in leaving this place. After all, verbalizing you detest it here does no good aside from engendering a dependency on armies.

Throughout my tenure in the community, it was a short while, yet I’ve managed to see every part. My peak as an administrator in the light of the community couldn’t shine a light over my downfall, when I was equated to the community’s idea of ‘scum’. The ideas put forward represent an amalgamation in my philosophy towards armies, which were shaped through these experiences. As a nobody, as an administrator, as a leader, as the shunned, it was these naïve, distorted, emotional experiences that helped me experience the greatest extent of the community. The reward here wasn’t to become a legend or celebrated for my actions by the current victors, it was to meet the great people that inspired my life down the road past armies. 

Despite making a home in several armies, I’d like to give the warmest gratitude to the Underground Mafias. To have the opportunity to lead an army considered legendary is an honor, but the greatest prestige yet is being recognized as one of the people who’ve maintained the conservative ideals that represented what UMA historically stood for. Whether it was Pink Mafias’ last stand against the clovers, or the Crew versus the world, the Underground Mafias never surrendered. Our culture outlives the entirety of the community, and will continue to remain as the last bastion of recklessness. There’s a lot of people to give thanks to, but those I recognize especially are the friends and family I’ve made here. Especially Dino for bringing me into EHUMA. Initially, I was told to avoid it and that nothing good comes out of EHUMA, but the same can be said about the side I first stood with. Greatest thanks to Dan and Bam too for encouraging me to take up the leadership position in the absence of Cobra, who has also done as much as the names mentioned. Aaron came later on, but it was his ignorance of the present and attachment of the past that encouraged us to stand our ground against the individuals we vilified. In the end, our army has always had the last laugh and continued to thrive even in the era of idiocy. 

Considering the shortage of braincells the community has, who knows if absolutely everyone could even read this to the end. Whatever is written is not for the sake of being read, as an alternative it’s for me. I’d like to move on from my digital home that fueled my youth, one final time.

In no particular order, I present to you, the audience, my last take…

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Withdrawal From The Legends Cup XI Tournament

Addressed to the U.S.S.U.M.A. and army community,

Today on July 25th, 2021, I am announcing the Underground Mafias’s official withdrawal from the Legends Cup XI tournament on behalf of the leadership and higher command.

This decision was reached unanimously within the higher command over the past few days, with our intentions before that always having been to take part.

However, our current team have been active within the community for some time now, and have therefore seen and participated in a lot of tournaments. With the seedings for each tournament being very similar each time, albeit perhaps due to a stagnant “top four”, we find it difficult to be excited for this. Having said that, we do hope to continue seeing and participating in more innovative tournament formats, such as the CP Army HQ’s Project: Conquest.

It is more important than ever before that we are innovating this community and game, as the alternative will see people losing interest with repetitive and stale formats. At this junction, the higher command are more excited in taking part in other events over the coming weeks and months that we believe will be exciting for our community.

We apologise if this announcement comes as a disappointment to any of our members or armies in the community. We would like to congratulate Ayan’s retarded army, the Help Force, for advancing into the second round of the tournament and wish them the very best. It is our hope that more new faces will have a chance to participate in more rounds moving forward.

We would also like to extend our gratitude to the CP Army Network and CP Army HQ for allowing this tournament to be independent of organisations and instead run by the army leaders. In the current divided community, this is definitely the most fair way to run the Legends Cup XI – a tournament that has a strong history and should be enjoyed fairly by all those wishing to take part. In particular, thank you to Iceyfeet1234, F6 Vedant and Superhero123 for their work in organising and managing the tournament. We hope those participating enjoy the experience.

Signed,

UMA Circle of Bosses

A Final Bid

Addressed to the UMA Nation,

      I was intending on departing for good back in June when I resigned as UM lead premier and dipped. Personally? I’m glad I dipped. This community is a literal cesspool ─ a cancer. I don’t why someone wishes to unironically spend time here anymore. 2020 was the last good year of CPA, and even then CPA really died in 2017. I’m glad to spend time in 2015 while I was able to.

However, Zamb and Bam contacted me about seriously taking up the legends cup reunion idea I proposed in May. It was a shock. Why bother with this year’s shitty gay ass legends cup? However, since Zamb wants to formally end his CPA career on his note and dip like me, I thought it was only right to accompany him. After all, the more people who retire from this community, the better. Plus, why not raise hell again like last year?

I have returned under certain conditions, however:

  1. The Underground Mafias will shut down completely after legends cup. I will either glass it off and turn it into an archive, or I’ll permit Aaron run an UMA CPPS hangout (albeit everything is completely revamped).
  2. No taking things serious. Fuck taking this shit too serious nowadays. CPA died in my opinion leisure wise. We shouldn’t be prudent about this genre of a dead online children’s’ MMORPG anymore. We already saw what happened to Red Winter, anyways.
  3. No other things are happening. No foreign affairs, no serious and long-term planning, etc. This is only for legends cup. We should only focus on the tournament battles (and maybe trainings before if needed). After we win or lose legends cup, UMA shuts once more. No wars, too.
  4. We have some fun. Give no fucks, entertain chaos only. The only “fun” is the discord (not the platform) that comes with being an underdog.
  5. After this, I will formally retire practically forever, and return to dipping. I am only leading on a throwaway alt for this, not my new main account. I refuse to go balls deep into CPA again, as I enjoy not being apart of this community and I relish being restrained from it.
  6. UMA culture is restored. No more fake ass snowflakery. I think if we aren’t UMA culturally wise, we are just like RPF, ACP, or DCP. UMA and Nachos are unique for a reason, keep it that way.
  7. The other members of the Underground Mafias administration will begin their transition away from CPA after this tournament.

That being said, I formally announce my temporary return to the top job. I will usurp the responsibility, and will lead with Zamb to a successful tournament. To the community: You are being put on notice. Be ready to rumble this tournament.

 

THE STEAL HAS BEEN STOPPED, UMA CLAIMS TOTAL VICTORY OVER THE LOWLY MEDIVAL WARRIORS IN THE DEFENSE OF MITTENS

hey hoooo show me those toes

Good morning to all soldiers, virgins, and CPAers alike. Earlier today the Eastern Hancock Crew was informed of a sorry invasion of the glorious server Mittens. Naturally without a moment to spare a defensive coalition was formed to stop these disgusting barbarians from wrecking our home and stealing our women. We successfully reclaimed Mittens and have formed it into a prosperous society with plenty of food and funko pops.

After much demand from the EH Council/Crew UMA will be aiming to participate in this upcoming Legends Cup, so naturally I have awaken from my slumber to make their wishes come true. Our religious Icon is none other than Ehroyals and our brilliant commanders will be Zamb and Dino as well as myself.

I promise you one thing, I will absolutely not try at all and I don’t plan on doing literally anything besides taunting you and continuing my efforts to make fun of literally everyone. This happening for one reason and one reason alone to either participate and win the Legends Cup, or prevent ACP from winning it.

-Kim Jong-Uma

Dictator for life or something

:)

the song is God’s Gonna Cut You Down by Johnny Cash for those who cant SEE IT.

Euphoric

-Aaronstone UMA Legend

-Dinorewrited UMA Great Mafias

Letter of Resignation

Effectively immediately I submit my resignation as Premier

Lol I’ll write a belated retirement post in the future. Just know that I’ve been busy with school and all. Aaron is trusted as the lead premier now.